WIP-anime style rpg game

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Hi!

This is the title of the game I’m currently making. It will be a turn-based rpg game. I will release this on steam as early access. (And also on itchio)

A release date has not been confirmed yet, though.

If you have any questions about the game, feel free to ask! (I am not good at English because it is not my native language… :l but I will try my best to answer)
And if there are any errors in the translation, please let me know. I have asked someone else to translate the story, but I’m not sure if the translation is good.

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The artwork looks pretty good :slight_smile: I did find some oddities in the english translation.

“However, a dream of sky of such human being was greater than anyone else.”

I think it’s meant to say something like this?:

“However, humans dream about flying more than any other race.”

Or

“However, humans dream about the sky more than any other race.”

Good luck with your project :wink:

Looks good sodafrost.

The English is okay in most parts. EpicSleeper is right about the flight school sentence. It needs work.

Here’s some more things:

“The main character, Celestine, is a rookie pilot who has just graduated from Canopy Flight School. At the request of Terra, his/her benefactor and best friend, he/she is searching for Cloud Heart, a treasure that has infinite power.”

If Celestine is female than you can say ‘her benefactor’ and ‘she is searching’.


Human is the only race that cannot fly in this world where sky islands float in the sea of clouds and flying is a normal thing.”

Change this to:
Humans are


In the game, players basically find new stories by raising character stats, NPC favorability, and reputation.

In the Features section, I would remove the word ‘basically’. It’s not a good word to use for describing something that you believe to be very good.

Sometimes those translation errors become memes

image

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Human is the only race that cannot fly in this world

It does have a poetic feel to it…

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Thanks for your kind replies. I corrected the parts you pointed out.

And about the he/she part. Celestine is the name of the main character, and the gender of the character is selectable. (Like a pokemon game)
That’s why I wrote he/she and his/her.

Finally, thank you again. I think it was a good idea to ask you guys. :wink:

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